I’ve recently realized that always expect the worst from everyone. I understand why and what about my past has led to this. It makes sense in the context of my life even if some of it is clearly irrational. I am dating someone who is, it seems, a sweet and kind person. Even though our relationship is casual and we’ve never agreed to anything in terms of exclusivity or any particular path, he is very respectful and always....gives more than I ask for or expect (it’s hard to describe). A couple of times now, I’ve really jumped to some pretty awful conclusions about him (never verbalized - thank goodness) that turned out to be wrong. The details aren’t super important, and honestly make me seem like a crazy person. How on earth do people who date as adults balance protecting yourself and being judicious about getting to know and trust people (wise in my opinion) with not always just assuming everyone is a pile of garbage?
Forgive me for all the dating questions. I have been in a relationship almost my entire adult life so I am....stunted and often even embarrassed to talk to my friends. I will broach the topic with my therapist who I am going to see again afyer a few years break. Clearly this issue probably extends beyond dating. I am just so vulnerable in a dating situation that it was extreme enough for me to finally recognize this issue.