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Feeling Like Death, a Family Reunion Production

I am back from my fiance's family reunion and I am all kinds of hurting. Not from alcohol consumption (his family is quite religious and don't drink - I don't think I saw anyone have more than a glass or two of wine) but from the fact that we went CAMPING on the motherfucking west coast of Canada in SEPTEMBER. Monsoon season. Wind warnings. Not enough alcohol.

I am now in the throes of pre-cold symptoms after driving 9 hours to get home today. I know I'm getting sick because I want to eat everything in my house, and considering that we have been gone for ten days, it is slim pickings in the Cumberbuttcheeks household.

The family reunion itself was pretty fun, despite the lack of booze. His cousins are all close in age and they get along really well. His family is the closest thing to the Von-Trapps I've ever seen. They broke out in song ALL THE TIME. And they were usually strange Canadian songs about missing Sherbrooke and being on a Halifax shipping boat. They are all incredibly musically talented, so there were people legit harmonizing and playing instruments and shit. I'm just sitting in the corner being the family alcoholic with my bottle of wine singing Celine Dion songs because that's my contribution to Canadiana. I really wanted to start an argument with someone to see if they would solve it via dance-off or diva-battle.


There were snuggly babies and big friendly dogs and campfires and delicious food. They were so welcoming and funny that I didn't want to leave even though my tent was collapsing under 60km/hr winds. It was the most pleasant surprise from a trip that I was sure was going to end in drunken arrests (as all respectable family reunions should).

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