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When your coworker is crying because she and her husband are breaking up and you are just relieved.

*Sarah* and her husband have only been married for a little over a year, but the stories she’s told have raised the hair on the back of my neck. So many abusive warning signs. He looks through her phone to see if any other men are messaging her. She has to leave work right on time, because he gets really upset if she isn’t home by the time he is. He doesn’t like it when she goes out with friends. He once put his fist through the wall of their hotel room because she wanted to lay around on the beach longer than he did. She always related these with the belief that it all meant he was crazy in love with her.


So all of us in this office are actually happy about this, but have to hide that for obvious reasons. One of my other coworkers said “Maybe you two can still work it out...” and then trailed off when we started glaring at her. The asshole told Sarah over the weekend that the sight of her sickened him! We’re all desperately hoping that this is the definite end to the relationship.

She said that she felt like a failure, so I told her that she isn’t defined by her marriage status and that she is so much more than that as a person. I told her I was really sorry, but don’t want to indicate in any way that the marriage was a good thing worth saving. What else can you say/do in these situations?

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