Happy Friday! Today’s fuck it goes to whatever the hell self esteem does when it comes to exes. My esteem seems to still not be able to let go of shitty people in my life because of ... I really don’t know what. Case in point - I get really lonely sometimes each week and stupidly ask my ex to visit him (2 hours away). I really have not much going on during the week other than gym time or many friends in my new location, so I tend to lean toward the comfort of spending a Friday evening with said ex. Lately he says sure but then cancels always at the last minute without any reason. So this morning, I call to confirm our visit tonight and he starts lashing out about things that I’ve done (which hurt the relationship - basic mistakes - nothing heavy like cheating) to seemingly do it just to make me feel like shit. So now I definitely do not want to take the time to visit him and am kicking myself again about not letting myself release this asshole from my life. This is somebody when we were dating, had a nice hotel weekend date at a hotel he used to work at with some of his friends, but when the weekend came to an end, wouldn’t walk out of the front door with me. He told me I had to take the stairs and meet him in the parking lot. Also the person who canceled our trip to the Bahamas for my birthday the day before ‘because of work.’
So, today FUCK shitty self esteem to not be at the top of the hill where it’s much easier to shake shitty people out of your life. Any words of wisdom are welcome.
How was your week? CAPS ALWAYS WELCOME!