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Gendered Insults: My peripheral thoughts on So C*nt

This So C*nt debate has presented me an opportunity to help out other GTers who want to stop using gendered slurs.

For a few weeks now I have been trying to wean myself off of gendered insults — both male and female. Yes, I understand and agree that only the female-gendered slurs (slut, bitch, cunt, etc) have been used historically to systematically curb women's behavior. However, it's a decision I made. Moving on!


The problem I encountered in this weaning phase is that most of our insults are gendered. :/ I was pretty much just using "asshole" on repeat whenever I needed to destroy some asshole's self-worth through politically correct parlance.

Then I discovered this formula: fuck + [any noun] = insult that is clear to everyone, even those who have never heard it before.

The real masterful beauty behind this equation is that the chosen noun can guide the tenor of the insult. For example:

My cat pushes my brush off the vanity. I say, "You're a little fuck biscuit, aren't you?"
CUTE insult! Also, this particular arrangement can be used in dirty pillow talk. VERSATILE!

Some one cuts you off on the interstate? Try, "GET BENT**, FUCK NUGGET!"

A co-worker brags about how they golfed their way into a promotion? An appropriate response would be, "Be gone, fuck weasel!"

Full Disclosure: This exploration of non-gendered insults began after I read a comment either on Jez or Gawker where someone called someone else a fuck nugget. They may have written it as one word: fucknugget.
Fullest disclosure: Fuck weasel is my favorite.

**Edit: lurkerbynature mentioned in the comments that "Get Bent" seems homophobic. I never ever saw it that way, but now that he/she mentions it, I can definitely see that. Learn something new every day! Let's change "Get Bent" to "GO TO HELL, YOU DIPSHIT FUCKNUGGET!"

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