Research is progressing slowly. Well, it's fun, but not the note taking part.

Other things giving me a severe case of the "AHHHHHs":

  • Rewriting my personal statement because I don't want to do what I thought I wanted to do.
  • Rewriting my personal statement with some bullshit I still don't know if I want to do.
  • Not knowing what I want to do with my life. I made a list. "Drink", "Writer", "Tortured Soul", "Be anywhere but here", and "See if I can still get into Hogwarts" made the list.
  • Nightmares about failing out of life.
  • Realizing my entire life revolves around school, and that's why I'm terrified of failing.
  • Realizing how fucked up the above is.
  • Thinking that I have no future, sobbing on the phone to my dad about how I'm just going to live in Europe forever.
  • And...my dad asking if he could give my number to his 60 year old friend so I could talk him down from being depressed or something.
  • Also pretty sure my dad's trying to set me up with his best friends kid...who is studying to be a doctor, which isn't so bad. Except the last time I saw him was at some party I can't remember. I think he may be 30. I'm 23. So, I don't even know.

I just want to have future me show up in a Tardis or something and and tell me what to do. And If I'm really a Timelord. That'd be legit.