Brace yourselves—I had indian food for dinner and I'm drinking a prune juice & vodka cocktail so it's gonna be a big one.

.

.

.

.

.

.

First, a shout-out to the Founder of the Daily Dump, Ubertrout, who informs me Couchplanted created the idea initially. Much like pilgrims brought disease and genocide to the Native Americans, you brought us the DD. May it be celebrated with a feast of stuffed turkey.

Speaking of things that need to be stuffed to absorb overflowing juices, LaComtesse brought us a wonderful work of poetry about her long-time friend, the tampon.

Hey Phoenix Jezzies, I want updates from HiiItsMeStan’s Phoenix meetup!

Advertisement

It’s hard not to sound like a pompous ass when citing your own post. Fortunately, I’m my own biggest fan, so HERE IS A REALLY GREAT AND WELL-WRITTEN POST DEFENDING LAURA AND LINDY.

Zap Rowsdower demonstrated the boundless possible sentiments that can be expressed with gifs. Namely, the desire to poop on a giant hotdog.

Advertisement

BRIMSG proved there’s something she can do in 45 seconds other than finish a bottle of wine, and it looks delicious!

Advertisement

FightingInFishnets asked GT for advice dealing with a really tough and confusing situation.

Paranoid_Shiksa_Feminista now has an extra large finger to give Texas Republicans!

Advertisement

We got a great image from SouthernHelle.

Advertisement

Mimi said what we have all thought before…if your SO doesn’t like GoT, it’s time to make like a Lannister and push him/her out of a window. But not really, please.

The lovely kcunning’s infinite eyeroll will outlast all the MRA bullshit .

Advertisement

Speaking of eyerolls, GreenHeart on another Jez body hair article.

Scout’s Honor, you should check out this post by Super Nifty Witty Username about the Boy Scout Jamboreally Shitty Event.

Advertisement

Second time recognizing my neighbor SouthernHelle, this time for posting a letter circulating our fine city in which a human envelope sealer, or intern, expresses his view that we are 3 bald eagles and a chorus of Proud to be an American away from solving our nation's problems.

Advertisement

JayneAllyson finally battled the bureaucracy surrounding a gender change on SSA forms and succeeded! Hugs!

And hugs for Ad Infinitum too!

Advertisement

Barlychew is hot just like an oven.

While my greatest accomplishment today was a tower of binder clips, Iron Mam opened up the Brag Bag and a lot of you have done brag-worthy things!

Advertisement

TyrannosaurusBataar and I are going to hang out and eat slightly limp sweet potato fries. Jealous?

Advertisement

Rokokobang wants that $20 goddamnit! With interest!

I’m not sure why MyPrettyFloralBonnet doesn’t just submit a compilation of Gifs in lieu of a resume.

Advertisement

I agree with ThereIsNoFluffy about coffee dates and suggest an alternate first date of drunk zorbing.

Advertisement

That’s all folks! Everything else will come out at tomorrow’s Daily Dump, so stay regular! And if you need any help:

Now go forth and dump.

Tiny post dump addition (a dumpling, if you will) that I was reminded about by chritter. Slay's GT Posting Etiquette Guide: http://groupthink.jezebel.com/guide-to-comme…

Advertisement