Well as I wrote a few days ago my cousin, late 60s died in his sleep. Laat night was the Wake. He looked very good like he was napping. His sister and brother took over everything, (sis and bro for remainer of post). Sis one of the most pragmatic take charge folks I know is doing what her late brother failed to do in life. Which is getting his affairs in order, bro is helping. Also the late cousins son and college grandson, and only grandchild, were there. Sis and bro never had kids. Also the late cousins live in girlfriend.
Sis told my mother that she needs to be strong and take care of everything with her brothers support. Sis said she will break down after its over.
Funeral was today but only had a graveside ceremony. Since he was a Vietnam War Vet there was a flag and Taps. When Taps pwere playing sis broke down and sobbed in her other cousin's arm. This was a cousin on her mothers side, we are related via her father.
My mother and I were the only ones from sis, bro and their late brother of their fathers side. Which made sense, very few of my mothers generation had kids out of 10 3 had onlies and their other brother is on the other side of the country had kids.
Also on tv series they show graveside services with chairs and a canopie over the chairs. We all stood. What's the norm?
Reception after. This was at the church sis attends. Bro got a caterer, sis and bro decided on the food. 20 of us got to the repection at noon, food came at 12:20, they served us at 12:30 and tried to pick up my plate 10 minutes later. The caterers had the food wrapped.up at ten of one except for cookies and brownies. We all felt rushed exceptnwe could stay. Eight stayed until 3pm talking and eating cookies and brownies. It was me, my mother, sis, bro, the girlfriend, a female cousin of theirs I never met and two others.
Well their female cousin, mid 50s incredible happy personality widow and very humorous. Until she said the word crow. Well sis and bro were showing pictures of their other living brother with animals, except sadly and horribly dead animals. He lives on the other side of the country and gives lectures across the nation on trackiing and hunting I thought crow meant hunting. Until she repeated the word crow followed by "in the Whitehouse". I was going to say something but nezt to me was a very teary girlfriend who just saw her long time live in boyfriend, at leaat 12 years but dating for 20, being buried. Sis gave her cousin a dirty look, then her cousin went on and on about her work with an antiabortion group. Bro sat next to me and started on telling us about working at a senior citizen thrift shop and sorting through clothes donated by college students. He said he had a lot of jeans with holes and tatters and he was going to toss them out when his biss said they were expensive. Sis found it funny and joked how a man who taught high school for 40 plus years be so not with it. Then we all left. It was obvios bro and sis wanted to end it on a humorous note not a political one. Then bizarrely their cousin who at this stage I did not like walked up and gave me a huge hug. I just patted her arm twice. The crow line my mother missed but found her charming, funny and nice, ugh.