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Great Moments in Pet Adoption Advertising

Here's Snow White.

Illustration for article titled Great Moments in Pet Adoption Advertising

Just look it me. Clearly, I am a Queen. You know it, I know it, and soon the world will know it.

Do you want to live with royalty? Here are my demands:

1. Please remove all dogs from the planet. If that is not feasible, then I will settle with living in a dog-free home. I will reserve the right to glare at your neighbor's dogs when the whim takes me. BTW: The whim will always take me because I HATE dogs.
2. I would like a quiet house where humans adore me and treat me like the monarch I am. Even though I am Royalty, I am still a benevolent ruler and you can continue to live in your house. I will however, be commandeering half the bed, the arm of the couch and the space directly under your feet while you are preparing my dinner.
3. I like to be brushed. It is important for a Monarch to look her best at all times. Please look at my picture again. Aren'€™t I the prettiest girl? You will tell me that I am pretty at lease 5 times a day.
4. I need several scratching posts placed around the house. I like to stretch and sharpen my claws. You might have to remind me to use the scratching post if I accidentally scratch on the couch. I am busy ruling, this makes a girl forgetful sometimes.
5. I feel the need to escort you to every room in your house. How do I do this? I somehow figure out where you are going and then I walk directly in front of your feet, in a serpentine fashion so that you cannot step around me, at an approximate rate of 1 step per 2 seconds. This will make you feel as if you walking in a parade no matter where you go in hour house. You are welcome. Parades are so much fun.
6. I would like a cat pal. It would be best if you also adopted my daughter, Kentucky Blue. She is a princess. You will love her nearly as much as you love me. She is considerably goofier however.
7. I get along best with male cats (except for my daughter). I don't want any other competition for my Royal Companion
8. I hate going to the MCSPCA adoption events almost as much as I hate dogs. I will be a very disagreeable girl when I am shown at these events. I will hiss at you and try to nip your fingers if you try to pet me. For this reason, I am also shown at my home, when I know my rule is unquestioned.

Here are my vital statistics. Was born 2010 and was saved from a high kill shelter in Kentucky, along with my kitten, with only hours to spare (being Royalty is a dangerous occupation). I have perfect litter box manners. Adopt me, and perhaps Kentucky Blue , and know what it is like to live amongst the upper crust. That is all. You are dismissed.

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