It’s been three weeks (as of 9:00 tonight, in fact) since my grandmother died. I’d been having good days and bad days, but it all hit me again last night and I cried myself to sleep for the first time in a while. I know it hasn’t been that long, but it feels like an eternity and I’m really raw today.
I HAVE to go to work today (working as a temp - if I don’t work, I don’t get paid and I make crap wages), but I have to be at work in 15 minutes and I’m still in my nightgown dinking around on GT. If I could blow the day off I would. So, I have to suck it up and have one of those days where just finishing the day without bursting into tears or yelling at someone will be the big accomplishment. It’s also starting to get hot as balls where I live, which only strengthens the need to withdraw, wrap up in the blankets (in the room where the AC is), and read, sleep, and cry the day away.
Also, in honor of TMI Thursday, Shark Week started a week early. My cycle has been getting increasingly weird, then this. I went to the doc and, fortunately, there’s really nothing of concern, most likely unremarkable hormonal changes in a 40-year-old woman (with PCOS and increasingly better-controlled diabetes). Given that the whole situation “down there” is vastly improved from 18 months ago I’ll take it. I just have to adjust to the annoyances being part of my new baseline, one that can now be expected to shift here and there. That, at least, is no big deal. However, being hormonal and grieving just sucks.
I’m open to all sorts of gifs, weird ones, critters being silly, whatever helps you get through the day.