How is it that I missed it? You can definitely do this, and it is WAY easier than making grits the dumb, regular way. I slow cook like twice a week, and I am a grits fiend, yet I didn't make a connection here. I did it overnight last night and what do I have this morning? PERFECT FUCKING GRITS. I didn't even put any cheese or cream in them - they are creamy on their own without all that!
I AM A MOTHERFUCKING CHAMPION.
If you wanna know, I did 4 parts broth/water + salt (if desired) to one part grits. Let them soak a little while so you can strain off the hulls and shit floating from the top, and then COMMENCE. Low for like 7.5 hours.
Here is why I am so annoyed I didn't figure this out earlier: I didn't have to fucking stir them at all. I stirred when they were done. No more standing at the stove for an hour fucking stirring (I don't care what you say - you have to do this to make them awesome).
ETA: I got this idea from my grandma who knows everything about everything. She said if you want them faster, do it on high for like 2.5 hours, but stir every 45 minutes or so.