So basically I have to write a comedic op-ed (possibly in a character voice, but doesn't have to be) about some hot button item in the news to perform at 8 PM tonight. Here's my problem: I don't want to write about Syria. I have my opinions on the matter, but I don't feel well-versed enough on the conflict to express them in a public forum. Plus, everyone else is going to write about Syria. I could do something on Chelsea Manning, but someone did it last week and got a ton of facts wrong and it would not really be cool of me to respond to that. I cannot and will not do anything about Miley Cyrus or twerking. I think everything that needs to be said has already been said.

So, you guys have any ideas? I'm not asking for a character or an angle, maybe just a link to a news piece that might be fun to pontificate on. Any and all suggestions are appreciated!