GT, you were right and I thank you.


So, I listened to you guys and was like nah. I can't visit. I'm good. I mean the last few weeks with Dean have been AMAZING. Like, he and I are both in a great place and we're so happy and I'm like in frigging floaty heart land.

So uh.

Dear HiveMind formally known as GT,

Eric showed back up on Saturday, just randomly showed back up. He shows back up to my house with a friend of ours. I am like the ??!???

So I'm just like okay... whatever. Come in? I'm in the middle of cooking dinner mind you. FIRST THING Eric does is hug me at my waist. I shoved him away cause hugs at waist are reserved for taller half only. He seems okay with this. My friend and Eric decide to play pool while I cook dinner. Eric tries more stuff. (GT, you guys were so right.) I am just like hey these are boundaries, please respect them. He seems hurt, but whatever. My friend and Eric continue playing pool and I do my thing cooking dinner. I'm apparently being anti-social cause I'm not involved in the pool playing.

Eric leaves in a pissed fashion leaving our mutual friend stranded a really douchebag move. I am now pissed because I was like Hey, GT was right! (that wasn't the first thought, just hindsight) My friend is like what the hell just happened. I tell him, your "bro" there is a douche.

So, my dear taller half comes over. I am still fuming because of Eric's idiotic behavior. He's like ??????????? ??????? ??????? I am not a good liar when I am angry. So, I told him after we drop off our friend I will tell you all. So once I come to tell him "Oh btw, Eric's back in town and didn't get that I am not leaving you."


Taller half is just quiet. Uneasy quiet, because he's not the type to be silent unless he is pissed. I am really scared that taller half is going to do something regrettable because I have not seen him this mad in a long time. I texted Eric this morning and told him not to randomly show up to my house ever again without an invitation because Dean's going to be quicker than the cops.

I just want to thank you all for giving me clarity into a situation that apparently I was hoping was not going to be there.

Thank you.


GT! What should I do? :/

So GT! I have a small drama that I need help with.


My best guy friend Eric (name changed), last time I saw him told me he was in love with me. He knows I have a long term boyfriend Dean (name change). In fact, he was friends with my boyfriend before he met me.

So Eric moved away a few months ago completely out of state, I helped him move because I am all for road trips that I do not have to pay for. He initially asked my boyfriend to help but because Dean's like nah, cause he hates I'm like me? Yay road trip?

So this was a five day trip cross country. Eric's mom and uncles went up there as well, but they drove the car while me and Eric drove the uhaul.

But because I am not at all good with cold weather, I'd pay for a hotel room every time we stop because... yeah no. Eric would sleep on the floor next to my bed, while his mom took the other bed and the uncles were on the cots.


This isn't really unusual sleeping arraignments. Trips with Dean & Eric & Friends were similar. Nothing happens.

I've spent time with Eric alone multiple times. No weird glances, no odd moments... Nothing that would say that he was developing feelings! We never really did anything I think was more than friends being friends. I have tried to analyzed if there was any point in our friendship that I've lead him on. I can't think of any.

I guess the only time I can think of is when I had to take Eric to the hospital by myself cause I couldn't get a hold of anyone. I stayed of course because no one should be in the hospital alone.


Throughout the time I have known Eric, he was dating and had a girlfriend or two for a couple of months. No big deal. Hell, he dated a friend of mine that I've had since childhood.

So... end of our little road trip and I'm getting ready to head to the airport. Eric tells me the whole "Hey, I think I'm in love with you'' story. I am not good with this. I am like oh crap crap crap. So I blurt everything out like "Why? You know I'm going home to your friend of 5 years+. " So he's like "Yes, I know. But." He explains to me how he saw mine and Dean's problems and it sucks you're being treated bad by him. You're too kind... etc.

Well, mine and Dean's problems were that I barely came out of almost dying from my illness and he had lost his job. We just didn't really tell anyone the whole story about our life, because that's how me and the taller half are. So we both were just working on building our relationship back up for the better part of a year. So we weren't always physically affectionate as much as our friends apparently are used to. (We're absolutely fine now. Still some money woes, but who doesn't have that.)


I explain this to Eric. He just smiles and gives me a really tight hug and we get into the car to go to the airport.

We kept in touch after that, our conversations seeming like he was good with the fact that I wasn't planning to leave my boyfriend or what not.


Eric wants me to come visit. I have no problem visiting him, he's a friend and I have to take time off work eventually anyway. Dean trusts me 100%. There is no issue there, because if it was he'd already dump me by now.


I'm not sure if I should without bringing another one of our mutual friends. Or should I be like "Um, I'll come and visit as long as you understand our previous conversation that we had in person didn't change?"

Or am I just being a horrid person? :\