I thought you guys might get a laugh out of this:

I read the first chapter and I honestly can't tell if it's serious or not, but either way, it's hilarious!

Just listen to the evil career-woman atheist evolutionist Aunt Petunia:

Aunt Petunia smacked her hands over Harry's young ears; and her voice was sickly sweet when she said, "Thank you very much for your concern, sir, but he does not need your religion, he has science and socialism and birthdays."

I don't know about you guys, but I think she sounds way more fun than the real Aunt Petunia.

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Also, while we laugh at this batshittery, let us also appreciate the fact that the Daily Mail is now trolling Fanfiction.net for content. Truly a proud day in the history of journalism.