This is a weird question that probably says exactly how much I wear shorts at all, but whatever happened to bike shorts? I just want something to prevent chub rub under skirts and dresses this week considering it’s actually warm enough to have bare legs, but bike shorts appear to have disappeared off the face of the earth.

The closest thing I can find is Spanx, and . . . no. What happened to bike shorts? Are leggings that end above the knee so verboten as a fashion thing that nobody sells them any more? Is it a conspiracy by compression garment manufacturers? Or are they still for sale in the US and shops in Ireland and the UK just don’t have anything for some reason?

For this week for myself, I guess I’ll be taking some scissors to an old pair of tights. I’m just confused.