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Made a taco salad with really spicy salsa and the salsa makes your nose run but the tissues are kinda far away so you eat faster because you don’t want to stop eating because the tortilla chips will get soggy, but meanwhile the nose runoff is slipping further and further out of your nose and it becomes a serious quandary: do I stop eating and wipe my nose or can I eat even faster?!

Yeah, me either. Cuz clearly a person like that would have to have serious issues, right, guys? Right?

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