So I put up an ad last night on Cl to just talk on the phone (yes I think I am allowed this as I was sad last night about the incident and still am a little). I talked to this guy for a long time on the phone and thought we could kinda keep each other company since apparently he found out his (now ex) gf cheated on him with the neighbor.

Anywho, he seemed pretty cool. He's still kinda cool but getting on my nerves now. We talked on the phone a while ago, then he says he'll call me back, so then I tell him to call me back later tonight 'cause I need to clean and do other things. What does he do? Dude sends me a pick of his stomach and dick. I'm not really offended 'cause we brought up the topic, but I'm just sitting here like "Uh really?" and then he calls me...after I had said to call me later tonight. Not 15 minutes later.

Are all men this dense?

Yeah yeah, #notallmen blah blah. Lol.

Oh yeah and let me share some awesome messages I got last night from CL. I need to keep laughing today and I wanna share so here goes:

#1

i am going to give you a taste of how i see the world:

i sometimes feel as though i might erupt into a cataclysmic supernovaic burst of inspiration to all musical artists on this ball of dirt we live on; something much like spontaneous human combustion but instead more fulfilling and striking. i have little to live for in this world other than the weak hope that humanity might not drive itself madly into extinction; and that i can somehow make the largest impact possible to promote alternatives.

this american empire is ruled by a shrinking oligarchy, and one day i am going to be one of the people holding the keys to the kingdom. i am a king, looking for my queen. truly all i need is a beautiful lady with a strong mind, keen intellect, and a heart big enough to accept all of the love i have to pour into it. i want to join with you and together we can craft a reality for ourselves that is suitable to both of our purposes. this is my invitation

I'm too tired right now. Someone else wanna do this one?

#2

Howdy lil lady. I'd like to text with you lil lady!

So apparently I'm a little lady.

From my last ad:

#3

Don't let the fact that I'm a mature well respected business man and Latin gentleman fool you.

I'm very active and physically fit.

I'm a Veteran, hwp, 190 lbs, hazel eyes, light complexion, professional entrepreneur, generous, and would love to be with you right now.

I'm DDF, had vasectomy and in good Heath. Expect you're the same.

Please respond with photo and if there is mutual attraction or curiosity I Would love to meet you, take you out to a nice place for dinner, and if you like I can give you a sensual massage worthy of an experienced man.

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Thank God he had a vasectomy... Heath? Heath bar?

#4

You might find this a little different. How about we become strangers withbenefits instead?

We meet, we please each other sexually, we go our ways until you want it again. No real names, no exchange of any personal information. Just two strangers having a sexual experience. I am 5'9", 190lbs, height and weight proportioned, brown hair, green eyes, std free, high sex drive and endowed (thick).

It might not be the reply that you hoping for, but at least i am straight forward about it.

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At least he's honest...I should be thankful for that.

#5

Have a gf but have 0 friends...

Poor guy. He has a gf but no friends....Ok. Makes sense.

Ugh there was this one that made me laugh and was like "I'll text your ass" or something. I'm sure it was like a spam bot but I thought it was funny.

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Anyway, hope that made y'all smile at least. :)