Welcome To The Bitchery
Welcome To The Bitchery

It's been a while since I've had to be a social animal and I think I forgot how to do it. For some context, I moved to a new city about a year ago, and outside of my boyfriend's friends, who are very nice people and absorbed me into their friend group, I've yet to meet someone I click with or could call just to hang out.

A few months ago I bought a groupon for a massage, and it turned out my masseuse (that sounds so fancy) was a woman around my age who's super awesome. I normally exchange pleasantries at the beginning of a massage and enjoy the rest in silence, but we ended up talking the entire time. I enjoyed the conversation so much I even asked a friend back home if it would be weird to ask "the masseuse" out on a friend-date. I got confirmation that it would be awkward and possibly inappropriate.


BUT, after our last session "the masseuse" was like, "Would it be weird if I gave you my number? I have fun hanging out with you and we should grab a beer sometime." And she did. Yay! The thing is she was out of town for a few weeks, and then I was out of town for a few weeks, and now the offer is over a month old. Every time I compose a text, I start with "Hey gurrrrl" or "What's shakin' laday," or something equally as bizarre and more suited coming from a guy spamming ladies on OKCupid.

So, basically I just need someone to internet grab me by the shoulders and say "DO IT!"

And yes, I am totally over-thinking this, and yes, as an adult this shouldn't be an issue, but it is.

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