Welcome To The Bitchery

For those of you following the adventures of Fat Caterpillar, I wanted to give a quick update since there hasn't been anything to say in about… 6 months? Ish? Maybe?

I FINALLY GOT MY FBI CLEARANCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now I just need to run by the police station here in town, give them $50, and get my State of California background check (which takes all of 5 minutes, apparently) and, in the words of my case worker at the Embassy, my "visa is ready for finalization". (If only the struggles of the FBI were as adorable as that corgi butt. But that is how I imagine them trying to process my fingerprints. Like seriously? How hard is it?)


It's looking like less than two months and I'll be back Down Undah, with Mr Fat Caterpillar and our amazing home!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lesson here is that if you ever, ever need a government document, no matter how long they say it will take, give them an extra 5 months to get your paperwork back to you. I was starting to freak out a bit but nope, they just DGAF about my stress levels and wedding date and all that jazz.


Now I need to get my ass in gear and start packing… I hate packing. On the upside, hopefully I won't be doing it again for a long, long time. Our house on the Mornington Peninsula is gorgeous and we don't plan on moving for at least 5 years.

This has been your Fat Caterpillar update!!!!! If anyone wants to come to the Central Valley here in CA and help me pack up all my shit, I will pay you in alcohol, books, and clothing that no longer fits me. Maybe some shoes. Definitely food. =)


PS: I still haven't found shoes for my wedding. I have literally no price limit, if someone can find me knockout, brightly coloured heels with gigantic bows I will be forever in your debt. (Ok, maybe a little budget. Like, please no $1000 shoes, ok?)

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