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Holy Shitsnacks! (A Lesbi-Crush Update)

So I had planned to write an "oh well" shrug-ey kind of update to my movie adventure with The Girl I Like; I'm glad I didn't though, because I found out there's more to the story than meets the eye.

Last week we went to see a free movie, had dinner (she suggested it) and went back to my bar for drinks. We had a fun time but...the weird vibe she had given me before was gone, she seemed very touchey-feeley yet platonic, she kept venting about her ex, and at the end of the night I got a few drinks in me and I tipped my hand. I planted my legs in her lap and asked as nonchalantly as possible "So you don't date girls, do you?"


She paused, scrunching up her face. "I dated a girl once and she ruined girls for me forever." We both tried to laugh it off, but some friends of hers showed up and I managed to hide my disappointment by slinking away.

Flash forward to last night. She stops by after my shift is over and we talk and she's drunk and our knees are touching and all of a sudden, seemingly out of nowhere, she mentioned she needs to work on her jealousy because was jealous when we went out that night.

And I was like "Lolwut?" because I didn't know why she would be jealous over me if she wasn't interested. Plus I'm not the one whose shitty ex boyfriend works with her.

Then she puts her head on my ishoulder and says "I don't know if I could date a bi woman because nobody is ruled out by gender. That's why I don't touch you as much as I want to, because it wouldn't be fair to you."


And I was like "Wait—what?" because I though she was saying my bi-ness made her uncomfortable touching me.

Then she said "I have a lot of work to do on myself and my jealousy issues before I can date anybody. That's why I don't touch you as much as I want to. It wouldn't be fair to you because I'm a hot mess."


And then I was like "Ohhhhh. Um. Yeah...It's ok, I gotta work on my hot mess too."

Then she swiveled out and our knees touched and we were looking at each other and there was all this frission and then she said "Yeaaaahh, see? I can't do this. I gotta be a good person."



So yeah. I know she likes me, she knows I like her but there's not much to do about it. I can't do all of the kinky things that keep me happy with an overly jealous girlfriend, so guess it'll just be longing glances and friendly hugs that last too long from now on.


Sigh. At least I was right. And my new vibrator arrived today. So there's that.

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