How do I teach someone who never grew up with concepts of unconditional love, turning the other cheek, and self reflection these ideas that seem alien and repulsive to them?

How do I make them see that their empathy muscles are severely atrophied and underdeveloped?

How do you make them aware of what passive aggression is, and why it's harmful?

How do you acquaint them with these values when they grew up in a fucked up house, where now they see everything in black and white.

What do you do when this person, who is confident and fine with himself, who never disappoints himself, but because of that narrow-minded nature, never makes allowances for your flaws? (though you make allowances for his, forgive and love, do your damndest to lead by example) Why are little fucks up so significant to people like that?

They don't even realize how they constantly expresses disappointment and voice their expectation that you will bring disappointment.


In some ways, I see my privilege here. I grew up loved, in a stable home, educated, where these values were ingrained in me from childhood. He grew up poor, in a crime riddled area and crime-riddled, abusive family, never went to college or learned real critical thinking, plus also grew up under that asian parent guilt (If you're asian, you know what I'm talking about! we have all lived it.) . Is an amazing, resilient person, under his pride and ego.

He can be open minded to learning things about himself...I just don't know how to broach this