You guys, I am stressed. I am stressed to the point of shaking hands and twitching facial muscles. I am almost at the point of being completely burned out. I realized today that I'm starting to just sit and stare at things without comprehension.

I really, really wish I could go into details here, but it's just too open a forum. Suffice it to say that you can't escape it when it lives with you. Home is not a sanctuary when the things that are driving you to insanity are part and parcel of that home.

I don't know what to do. I really, really want a drink (or 10) or a big fat bowl, but I'm afraid that something else will happen and if I'm not sober...

I'm just a mess, you guys. I want to run away. I want to sleep for a month and have everything gone when I wake up. I want to go back in time and make some different choices. My brain is tired. My body is tired. How do I relaX when every minute has the possibility of being another crisis* ?

*For anyOne inclined to think I'm exaggerating, I'm really not. I'm starting to be afraid to answer the phone.