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I Am A Beast (alt. title: defeating procrastination-panic)

I am literally, LITERALLY the most productive person who ever existed. I have completed an inhuman amount of work over the past 4 days. I am literally, LITERALLY going to die of high self esteem. I have achieved zen. I have achieved the Elevated State of Efficiency. I have achieved perfection.

The stages of panic:

  1. List making.
  2. Revising list. Make new list. Better list. Turn it into a spreadsheet. Color code something.
  3. Stop looking at new emails.
  4. Stress nap.
  5. Accomplish one thing, take too long to recover.
  6. Freak out at how much more there is to do. Not do it.
  7. Not do it.
  8. Stop sleeping, have stress dreams, avoid email.
  9. Get drunk. Vent to friend or SO about stress level.
  10. Literally die.
  11. Rise from dead.
  12. BEAST MODE: Elevated State of Efficiency. I do everything fast, I do everything right the first time, and I do it GREAT - better than usual.

People like to tell me I’m lucky that I have stage 12. While I would agree, I would like everyone to know that I usually don’t make it so far and end up in a spiral from 1-9.

I just BEAST MODED all this work I was backlogged on because we had a, um, staff issue which required a shitload pieces to pick up. If I can beast through this week, I will, once again, achieve that magical place where there are WEEKENDS in my life.

How do you get shit done?

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