Mr. lurker and I are theatre lovers. Normally this time of year we're completely splurging more money than we really should on a theatre festival. This year, we didn't quite get it together. I've got tickets for one show, but nothing really caught mr. lurker's attention except for one show there was just no way I was going to.

The big event the festival was pushing hard this year was a German production of Hamlet. We both love Shakespeare, but the first theatre festival we went to together (ten years ago) featured the worst Hamlet we'd ever been subjected to. Like, I still get ragey talking about it — among other things that cut the text to ribbons, it had Hamlet dropping his pants and raping Ophelia on stage. We would have walked out if we hadn't observed that someone near us tried to do just that, only to find that somebody had locked the doors (do not get me onto the illegality and danger of that fire hazard either), and the script was so cut that it was performed without an intermission so we couldn't leave then either. I'm not exactly a strict purist (I mean, the last production I saw, I was the one trying to explain why ending with an interpretive dance with everybody in their underwear and getting wet actually worked really really well), but no matter how you adapt Shakespeare you need to have respect for and understanding of the text, and this production didn't. Because of that, we'd been pretty much avoiding Shakespeare-related productions at the festival, and from hearing other people's reactions that's mostly been a good call.

So, I was really surprised to hear that the only thing catching mr. lurker's eye this year was the big ticket German production of Hamlet . . . that was getting pushed with the words "spectacular" and "mind-blowing, spit-hurling, earth-moving" and had the warning "contains loud noises". . . and that had a run time of 2 1/2 half hours with no intermission. Oh yeah . . . and was performed in German with surtitles in a the biggest theatre in the city, when mr. lurker is a slow reader and won't admit he's nearsighted enough to need glasses to read subtitles off the TV screen in our living room (He just has me read them out loud instead. Not doing that for live theatre). And then he gave me sad puppy dog face when I made it clear that that was the last thing in the entire festival that I'd think of getting tickets for! (He gives really good sad puppy face.)

So, the reviews are out today, and I just txted him choice quotes. Because from the sounds of it, I was totally right and he would have hated it so much. So, because I WAS TOTALLY RIGHT, we're not getting subjected to something we'd both hate, and I'm going with his sister to a site-specific immersive production Sunday. (Which mr. lurker wasn't interested in because he's much more of a traditionalist when it comes to theatre . . . another reason he'd have hated the German Hamlet and I was totally right.) Ha! to mr. lurker's sad puppy eyes.