I am, as my new name suggests, stuck in purgatory. I don't know what the better move is in my relationship. I am not in romantic love with my husband anymore, even though I love and care about him. He knows this and I have been trying to work through it in therapy. He wants to know why, but I don't have a good answer. There might be a bunch of nuanced things, maybe I just grew into a different person, but there is no one specific thing I can point to as the culprit. Because of that, I can't tell him what I need from him to change. I don't know whether it is possible to fall back in love. I don't know how long I am supposed to try before I know that it won't work. I don't know if the kinder thing is to let go so I am not keeping him in limbo, too.
I can't focus on anything right now. I am so riddled with guilt and indecision. I don't expect you guys to have a magic wand, but I needed to vent so I can try and do some work instead of sitting here feeling the weight of all this sitting on my chest.