I finally went to the doctor to get treated for my depression! It has been years. YEARS. I am lucky in that my depression isn't super severe; I've never felt suicidal, and it has rarely been so bad that I couldn't face going about necessary parts of my daily life like work and school. Recently, though, the depression has been getting worse. I've been missing work, have spent days completely unable to get out of bed/off the couch, and my normal coping mechanisms have not been working at all. That scares me.
So. I finally decided that enough was enough. Enbravened by a possibly excessive amount of wine, I went online and scheduled an appointment with my doctor for this morning (there was no way I was going to make a phone call about this). And I went, and it was not the worst thing in the world! I now have an appointment with a psychologist to get the therapy ball rolling, and an antidepressant prescription as well. I'm pretty emotional now and I keep tearing up at my desk for no apparent reason, but I think I'm feeling hopeful.
I really want to get better.