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I feel like an asshole. long

And I keep being told I shouldn’t, but I do anyway. I went to play games with my boyfriend and his friends from college. I think I’d only met them like once before.

When we were too drunk to pay attention to games we started talking and somehow got into some philosophical discussion that ended up with two guys one one side, me and two other girls on the other and my boyfriend playing mediator between the groups. It was a little heated, but the main thing is that one of the guys kept being extremely condescending, ignoring our arguments, asking things like “Do you know about the law?” (uh, no dude never heard of it, plz explain...), implying we didn’t know anything about things that we are actually trained in or studying, and trying to say that our education on the topic was invalid because we all studied social sciences (even though the topic was a moral thing that the social sciences actually explore and that’s the humanities calling the social sciences useless... but whatever!!)

Around the 4th time he referred our group as “you people” I peaced out. I’d been asking my boyfriend to leave for about an hour, knew we weren’t going to agree on this, and was tired of his shitty attitude. I didn’t want to make a scene and was tired of his aggressive debate tactics (which was pointed out to him and he said he wouldn’t take back) and didn’t want to say something that I’d regret, so I grabbed my coat and said I’d wait outside. One of the guys came out and tried to talk me into going back, and I explained that I just wanted to cool off and was tired and wanted to go home anyway, no hard feelings. My boyfriend came out to talk to me and I asked him to take me home.


My boyfriend says that this is what his college friends do, have these debates and stuff. Last time I was with a group of them that late we had Devil’s Advocate dude and I got out of that one to, though with less of a scene since it was a bigger party and I just wandered off. They all went to this private college together and I think a lot of the guys don’t realize a) how condescending they are and b) that its really privileged to be able to talk about stuff like it doesn’t affect you and that other people take these things seriously because it affects them. I got told how “that’s just the way he is” and to be honest, the gender split on the debate didn’t help either. Everyone keeps telling me that it’s fine, I didn’t ruin friendships, and all that. But I still feel like I ruined everyone’s night and then I’m mad because I wasn’t the one acting a fool all night. So I still feel like an asshole.

That’s it. From now on I’m staying in at night with my dog.

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