I just got hired as a cocktail waitress in a place that has a clearly defined sexual harassment and anti-discrimination policy, PTO, and pays about as much as I was making before!!! It gave me an excuse to buy a cute LBD (it's my work uniform)!
And my old job has now been exposed in several newspapers as a place that is super shitty to its employees so I'm cackling in glee!
Once I get money again I'm gonna buy a bike you guys. And groceries. And a satin pillowcase so my hair doesn't get all tangled. And (OMG!) pay my bills without a panic attack.
ETA: Oh! Oh! Oh! I recently did a commercial for a really fancy vibrator and not only did they pay me well for my commercial they're giving me the vibrator to try at home. This summer is gonna be awesome.