So a lot of my FB friends have been sharing this lately and it really pisses me off.
It's called "23 Things To Do Instead of Getting Engaged Before You're 23" and I get it — some people want something to tell them that it's okay to be single, because they are feeling pressure to "settle down".
But frankly, it's snarky and doesn't make a whole lot of sense. Where I'm from, I'm practically an old maid for waiting until 24 to get married. Where other people are from, I'm a weird uber-conservative for doing so.
A few major issues — the author seems to be equating getting married with immediately having children. She also seems to be presenting a dichotomy of either married or completely single, which is also not true. It also seems to be based on the stereotypical timeline of graduate high school at age 18, get a bachelors at 22, all while single and childless which is totally not the case for a lot of people out there. That's a big reason that people in my hometown don't wait until 22 or 25 to get married and have kids - if they don't plan on going to school and get a good job they feel it's perfectly appropriate to "settle down" at 19 or 20.
I refuse to believe that I am "too immature" to be married, or that because I am married my life is now over. That is ridiculous. Being married, for me personally, has only opened doors for me (I like stability and yay for two incomes and a house and a dog and COWS!). There is literally nothing I want to do that I can't do because I am married.
Some of the more choice quotes:
I have begun to notice a common thread amongst all these young unions: inexperience. Inexperience with dating, traveling, risks, higher education, career direction, SEX, solitude, religious exploration, etc… and it's insane that I have already experienced more of the world in the last 22 years than my married peers will ever experience in their life.
I have dated and slept with a handful of people - some were decent decisions, some were not. Some were long relationships, some were one-night-stands some were in between. I felt pretty done with it. Nothing I was really craving left to do. I fail to see what being married has to do with my religious exploration, higher education, travel, etc.
Okay, I was going to pick out more quotes but I can't even. It's all so rage-inducing. I'm sorry if I am being oversensitive. I leave you some of her final words:
Some days I wake up and stare at my ceiling thinking: "I'm single as fuck." But then I realize that those friends are going to get knocked up and fat soon sssoooo in retrospect, who really is winning here?