I am now Snow Princess Frostybutt. Considering that my butt does get quite cold during the winter, I find this rather fitting!
I also forgot to tell you guys yesterday, something nice happened and I wanted to share it.
My ex and I spoke last night for a bit, and I'm not going to relay the entire conversation because that is rather unnecessary. But one thing he said stuck with me and it made me feel really...good.
At one point I told him "I will always love you and care about you very, very much, no matter what our relationship is. And I know that you care and cared about me and love me, I never doubted that."
And he replied "I'm happy you know that. I do love and care about you, I'm just not fit for a relationship. I know I snapped at you a lot and took a lot out on you, and I'm so sorry. You did nothing to deserve that. You're a great person and were a great girlfriend. I never meant to hurt you and I'm sorry for any times I did."
It was just a very nice thing to hear, and it kind of flipped a switch in my mind that made me realize "oh, it wasn't me." I know a lot of people told me that, but I think I needed to hear it from him. And I obviously can't convey how he said it through text, but it was very, very genuine and sincere.
I don't want anyone to think that the conversation we had was us saying we are still in love or want to be with each other or anything. It was a long conversation about a lot of things, mostly us giving the other closure (on my end I told him that he's a good person and that I don't hate him, and I know he tried very hard, and that he deserves love whether it's from me or someone else, and I hope he realizes that one day) so we could potentially have a solid friendship at some point in time. Not right now, for obvious reasons, but this is a step in the right direction.
It just...made me feel nice. *Shrug.