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Welcome To The Bitchery

Tell me your favorite comfort food and how to make it. I’ll start:

Labor Intensive Vegetarianish Chili (ish because I use beef broth but you wouldn’t have to). Thank the sweet lord baby Jesus I made this Monday and have it around.


Yield: a dickload. Prep/Cook Time: a million hours


  • couple big sweet potatoes, peeled and chopped into 1ish inch cubes
  • some dried chiles (I used 4 chiles de arbol and 2 chiles pasilla)
  • paprika, chile powder, cumin
  • 3-4 tblspn vegetable oil (or, if you’re me, 2 tbspn and sub in 2 tbspn bacon fat)
  • small yellow onion, diced
  • 3 poblano peppers, diced
  • dickload of garlic, minced
  • can of hominy (white or yellow, don’t matter)
  • 3 cans beans (I used 2 pinto and 1 black)
  • 1 bigass can crushed tomatoes (or, whole tomatoes that you crush in your fingers and pretend are Donald Trump’s testicles)
  • 1 jalapeno, chopped finely
  • lime juice
  • broth, enough to make it cover everything and then maybe a cup or so more to add while cooking (I like beef the best)
  • 2 tbspn corn starch (optional)
  • Salt, pepper, fixins to taste


  • toast chiles for like 1 minute in 300ish degrees until they puff up; remove seeds. pulverize with a little bit of lukewarm water, just enough to make everything move around (warning, this is going to create chemical warfare in your kitchen so open a window or some shit)
  • mix a couple tbspn oil with the spices until it forms a paste. Add in the pulverized chiles
  • add the rest of the oil or bacon fat to skillet and toast the paste over medium heat for like, a minute or two (until fragrant). Throw in garlic - one minute. Throw in peppers and jalapeno and onions and cook until onions translucent (maybe 3-4 minutes)
  • Throw all that shit, plus can of tomatoes, sweet potatoes with enough broth to cover. Bring to a boil, reduce to a simmer, and cook half covered for about 1.5 hours, stirring maybe once every 15 minutes at least.
  • Add beans and can of hominy, more broth if needed - cook an additional 30 mins.
  • Squeeze 1 lime worth of juice in there, stir
  • If you want to thicken it up, take 2 tbspn corn starch and put it in a jar or something that you can get a real tight lid on. Then add a quarter cup of just the liquid from the chili. Put the lid on and shake the goddamn shit out of it until it is a smooth, pale brown liquid. Add back into pot, stir around.
  • Cook for an additional 15-30 minutes.

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