by a bunch of friends who have both dresses and dates. I have neither. I really don't want to go, but everyone keeps getting all, "you'll never go to something that can be called a prom again! It's the last one! We need pictures! You have plenty of cute dresses, even if they're not totally prom-y!"

I need a bunch of mice to sew me a dress (there is one who lives in my room, I have named him Ernesto, but I don't think his sewing skills are up to par). I need a fairy godmother. I need at least ONE person who is going to not have a date.

I want to sit here tonight, drink wine, play League of Legends, and expound on the virtues of waffles over pancakes on twitter with you lovely people.