On the cover of the Globe that one sees at the checkout line there was the newest Globe. Prince Harry’s aunt gives the marriage five years.

That threw me down memory lane circa 1982. I have cousins who I have not seen since circa 2001. They are my mother’s late mother’s late sister’s three children. Essentially my late grandmother’s late sister’s kids. They are a single sister (s1) a late married sister (s2) and a brother also alive.

It was the brother’s wedding reception. He married a woman with two teen kids. No idea their names. My mother, myself, my late grandmother, S1 and S2 were at a table along with their friends. S1 asked how long will the marriage last. My late grandmother who already had her opinions jumped in at 6 months. S2 simply said to S1 her husband would kill her for asking this question of the guests. S2 did answer also but her husband was paying for the reception. He got it at a low discount since he ran the Church’s bingo and casino nights. He did pay for the food, chicken was main course.

Three months later the Phone Call came. Yes capital letters a phone call repeated many times at family gatherings. S1 called and speaking that my late grandmother could not understand. My late grandmother thought something was wrong, actually it was. S1 was in hysterical laughter that she won the bet. Her brother was home his wife kicked him out.

Why? Well he did not work, he would do odd jobs here and there but that’s it. The wife worked 40 hours a week. He was obsessed with his weight and what foods went into it. Well he thought he could apply that to her kids so while they were at school and his wife working he got chains and wrapped them around the fridge. His wife got home went for some food which she paid for and was greeted with a chained fridge. She said two words “get out”.

The retelling always ended up with “good for her” and “your brother what was he thinking

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I can only conclude if I have a cousin who predicts how long a marriage will last and in this case probably very wrong and I have a cousin who does this and a late grandmother too I could be related.

Note: me being related to the royal family is done tongue in cheek. The story just brought memories of one of the great family phone calls ever.

Note 2: Yeah I was totally not surprised how marriage ended or the length. I would have predicted a week if my mother let me answer.

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I hope the wife found better people in her life along with her kids. The sisters especially S1 could be very toxic. The brother if you talked to him about weight, food and especially weightlifting and weightlifters he would be fine. Oh and 1950s and 60s Hercules style films with George Reeves (Hercules not 1950s Superman). He believed that Hercules actor had perfect body. To this day I have no idea what she saw in him. S1 believed she really just wanted a father for her kids since he did not work beyond odd jobs which consisted of running errands for people like dropping stuff off.