So my husband of twenty-eight years has an affair with our kid's best friend's mom. This kicks off two solid years of crazy. Counsellors,humiliation, cruelty, grief and consistent, remorseless, never ending deception and theft. 2014 was one long, endless howl of agony.

So here i sit getting my hair colored and I cant stop crying. Im supposed to leave today for New Orleans. I have to find a home, then come back here and move down there. It's time to go and start my new life and I'm so fucking exhausted and full of grief I cant function. And all of my friends in real life are sick to death of me. Today I can't tell what is important and what is not. Today I feel like I can't even do a load of laundry. I need to hear that everything is going to be ok, that I will sleep again, and that I will have happy times and they will be real. I'm 55 years old and I need my mama so bad.