so glad I did that. Tonight was a perfect storm: my unexpected cold, my pms, and my mother's birthday. Of these three things, my mother's birthday is the trickiest. I planned nothing. My father planned nothing. My father never plans anything, so this is not new. I'm not sure we got through unscathed. I did not plan a fancy dinner. That would be my father's job. Which he didn't do. He went out after dinner to pick up an ice cream cake that was yummy, if too frozen to cut a bite from. I think the dog house is solidly occupied by him. I thought, and this was best, that since I am unpleasant when pmsing and unpleasant when ill, as well as unpleasant when expected to do things because I'm "supposed" to, it would be best for me to stay out of the way. So we sat around the tv, eating cake that never had any candles, and watched the beginning of an NCIS episode that I'd already seen. It was pretty darn awkward, but I still have all my limbs and my emotions are still in working order. My mom's birthday is always a precarious dance, and my father should know this by now.
there is an incident that I am *genuinely* not allowed to talk about. Last time I brought it up, I got glares from everyone. One time, when I was about 8 or 9, my father told my mother that it wasn't "convenient" to celebrate her birthday. She got in her car and we didn't see her for 6 hours. It's been a touchy subject ever since. We all know this. We really don't learn from it very well.