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"I'm confused by X" or "I don't understand Y" ≠ I'm dumb

When I don’t understand something, I often say that I am confused or don’t understand it - even if I feel like the issue isn’t my comprehension, it’s that the information is not there or is not presented well. But inevitably, I feel like people interpret it as being that I am too feeble-brained to understand.

Does this happen to others? Is it something we are socialized to do as women - to frame it as though the issue is our comprehension rather than saying, “You haven’t done X, Y or Z clearly or completely.” Is it niceness or is it lack of confidence in our perceptions and knowledge base?


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