Welcome To The Bitchery

Here's why:

I don't come from a bee, so don't call me honey

I am not made of sugar, so don't call me sweetie

I am not made of sugar in the shape of an aorta, so don't call me sweetheart

I am not a Pig in the City, so don't call me Babe

I am not an infant, so don't call me baby

I am not a child, so don't call me kiddo

I am not a Peter Pan character, so don't call me Darling (I messed that one up before)


I don't work on a ranch, so don't call me dude

And I don't really know what toots means, but if I did I'd come up with one for that

I'd rather someone call me "hey you with the face" than an insincere nickname. I'm not gonna claw your eyes out or anything, but I will secretly hate you until you go away.

You can also call me chuckles if you want, I don't mind chuckles, call me chuckles


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