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Illustration for article titled Im so tired of living where I do.

I apologize if this seems kind of petty or ripe with first world problems, but it is what it is, and it's been really grinding my gears lately.

As some of you know, I live in rural Missouri. I first came here for college, graduated in 2010, and except for a turbulent 6-month gap in 2011, I've been here ever since. For the first year or so after I graduated, it wasn't that bad — I still had a lot of friends here, and I really didn't know what I wanted to do with myself post-college, so staying here was as good as anywhere else at the time. Now, three years out, all but a very few of my college friends are still here, and my girlfriend is pretty much the only non-coworker person that I see on a regular basis.


Admittedly, during the summer, it's not that bad. There are garage sales and the farmers market to go to, plus a lot of gardening, canning and wildcrafting to be done. Any other time of the year, though, I hate being here, and this year my loathing for this place seems to have gone to new levels.

It just feels like I'm really starting to miss out on a lot of the things I enjoy. I'm a bit of a foodie and definitely a beer snob, and there aren't any new restaurants or bars to try ever because a new eatery only opens up here maaaybe like once every six months. I desperately miss going to art galleries and concerts — going to a major show now means driving 3+ hours each way in any direction. Also, I seriously hate that all of the coffee shops here close by like 7 p.m. every evening. I grew up in St.Louis, and I'm still accustomed to being able to escape to a coffee shop at any time on any day (there is at least one coffee place in STL that is open 24/7/365, and I've spent so many glorious hours there). Also, I really, really miss my friends, especially my platonic soulmate, whom I haven't even seen in like two (!!!) years.

So why am I even still here? Well first of all, I have/live with my girlfriend, and I have to take what she wants into account (she also wants to leave, but that's another story). Then, it certainly doesn't help that I was unemployed for seven months between last December and this July, and it became pretty much impossible to save up enough money to drive to out-of-town job interviews, put down an apartment deposit, etc. as I was essentially living benefit check to benefit check.


I got a job working as a TV production assistant, and it's a bit of a blessing and a curse. It's a blessing because it's one of the few jobs in town that is actually desirable in other places, and my plan has been to keep my head down and be a model employee and maybe I can get a good recommendation to transfer somewhere else (we're about to be bought out by a major company that owns like a bajillion stations). It's a curse because I more or less HAVE to stay here now so I can get more job experience, and that really chaps my ass, although I keep telling myself I'm still here for a good reason.

So, TL;DR: I live in a place that I hate, but I'm kind of stuck here, and I hate that fact too.



Can someone in a big city please adopt me? In addition to TV production work, I am a champion at gardening/working outside in all temperatures, I've been told I write well. and I'm always super duper organized. That has to count for something to you people, right?

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