Welcome To The Bitchery


When I came back to work from lunch yesterday there was a baby bird in the driveway. I got out and moved it to the grass next to the building next door while its parents anxiously watched. All afternoon I can hear it bitching and complaining from across the driveway and through my double paned office window. That bastard is LOUD

As there are cats around here I assumed it would be gone this morning. I assumed incorrectly. He was still there and still bitching. I saw one of his parents bring him some food and he was preening his little underdeveloped wing so it's doing ok.

I called a wildlife rehab but they don't do birds (BIRDS ARE PEOPLE TOO!) and suggested I hang a basket or planter in the tree and put baby in it. So I drive home (only a few minutes away) get a hanging platform feeder I'm not using, hang it in the tree, put the baby in it and....it promptly walks to the edge and FLINGS ITSELF OUT AND TO THE GROUND. DUDE REALLY? So I try again. Same result. I move the feeder closer to the ground...bird takes a dive. So I set the fucking thing on the fucking ground and put the little bastard in it and it fucking stays there. And I can still hear it complaining about everything.


I got this pissy faced picture before it threw itself out the second time.

TL:DR: I have found the only baby bird that is scared of heights.

Share This Story

Get our newsletter