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Is this the calm before the storm?

Thank you all for being so supportive. For context, I told my boyfriend a month ago that I was depressed. His near immediate response was to say he wasn't sure if he wanted to be with me anymore. The story is here.

Anyway, now he is my ex-boyfriend. We met today—we have both been abroad until now—and broke up.


I felt he had done a horrible thing by saying he had doubts about us because I'm depressed.

He felt that (a) he hadn't, and (b) "he just couldn't be there for me right now."

So it's mutual-ish; I know he betrayed my trust but I still feel rejected. He also said he really wanted to be friends and implied that he would be open to getting back together in the future (presumably when I'm "better"), which is all sorts of fucked up.

I'm too tired to do a blow by blow recap. I feel this mix of sadness, anger, and indifference. I don't know if I'm going to fall apart later. Right now, I'm just trying to stay calm and so far it's working.


I just, ugh. I'm going to miss him. I hate that things ended in this way. But I also don't feel like he deserves any more tears. He just cannot be there for me and I know (or at least hope) that is not too much to ask for.

P.S. I named him "Premature Ejaculator" in my phone directory.

P.P.S. Hugs please.

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