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I've decided to become a plutocrat

It seems like it's more fun. Henceforth I will be borrowing against my assets, which I gauge at about $3k. Assuming I pay the same level of fees as the fabulously wealthy, and also assuming that my payroll taxes and such go away because I have decided to be a plutocrat, I will owe nearly $50 every year in money management fees. God, now I see what they're complaining about! I demand that the fees be lowered. This is fascism!

This is, naturally, a direct result of the world going wonky. Figuratively is now included in the dictionary definition of literally. To filibuster means to bloviate. I hereby rename poverty Extraordinary Wealth.


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