Seriously, look at that mug. Doesn't it just make you want to rear back and jam your knuckles into the deepest recesses of that pockmarked visage?

How great would it feel to grab that tie, wrap it around your fist nice and tight, spit on your fist (it will make it feel LEGIT) and drive it right into that fleshy neck of his, while screaming, "SORRY, MY FIST DOESN'T HAVE A TRANSFER AGREEMENT!"

"Don't worry John, I conceived this beating way less than twenty weeks ago!" KAPOW!


Is there anything that would make someone happier than planting one right across the chin of this backward, hateful, terrible person?

Well, yes. Safe, legal access to abortion, the ability for women to have agency over their own bodies, for rich old white men to stay the fuck out of women's uteri, and to have my crazy forgotten uncle leave me hundreds of millions of dollars on the condition that I spend a smaller amount within a given time frame, like Brewster's Millions.


Sadly, this is one of those days that I feel like the last one has the best chance of happening.