My mom can sometimes be wonderfully hilarious - especially when I bring up feminist issues, or things other women have said about feminists.

First - what you should know about my mom: she is very well educated, has advanced degrees and certifications, is very well respected in her field, an atheist, got on birth control ASAP when she started college in 1968, never takes shit from anyone man or woman, but also got married directly out of college, does not understand why anyone protests or marches, and has never called herself a feminist (she often looks at me puzzled when I use the term and says, "You're so much nicer and reasonable than what I've seen some of those women say!" *FACEPALM*)

So when she says things that are (A) funny as hell, and (B) would make any MRA, "traditional woman", or far right conservative hiss in horror, make the sign of the cross, and utter "FEMINAZI!" like a curse, it makes me giggle and my heart sing.

Today, for example:

LS: *shows me these bizarre crocheted cupcakes she got at a fundraising meeting for a college board she sits on* "Isn't this something?"


Me: "Oh it's something, Mom. I'm just not sure what."

LS: "Well, it's still pretty cool. She made eight HUNDRED of these!"

Brother Leftenent Smithwell (from the other room): "Yes, probably while watching her stories, cooking dinner for her husband, and vacuuming with pearls."


Me: "Don't be silly; the pearls were probably vacuuming by themselves."

LS: "Oh that reminds me - next time I go to Costco, I'm getting a Roomba. Screw vacuuming; who wants to waste time doing that - why do you think I make Dad do it?"



Telling her about the Susan Patton and her articles:

"What?! Wow, Princeton must have had really low graduation requirements when she went there."



(very drily) "I think my way was better: just date and marry the much older best friend of your roommate's brother."



"Your father lasted one semester in junior college and he's still smarter than anyone I met in college. Look at who you married, too - good thing we didn't listen to anyone like her."


Well played, Lady Smithwell. Well played.