So today I made Breakfast for Dinner, wished I had booze, and otherwise just feel sad and lonely.

My husband is doing...okay? There's still a lot of distance, though, and I worry it won't ever close again, and that that's my fault (it's hard to be in love with someone that you feel like the nagging big sister to). My Mom and sibs on that side are in Hawaii for my Mom's graduation, so no Mom's house today. My Grandma didn't go to Christmas Eve last night, and has been generally acting strange. Last night was fun, though.

Sigh. I usually really love Christmas. This year I kinda want to cry.