As you may have heard. the state of Michigan is currently facing a situation where the governor has poisoned a city and the state legislature has decided that protecting him is more important than helping the affected people. Just when those of us who live here were concerned that they couldn’t do anything else at the same time while covering up for Poison Rick, they proved that they could indeed multitask.

Behold - the state Senate voted to ban anal sex. Yes, I know the Supreme Court made such laws null and void years ago, butt...