My mom is on FB (she's a junior-varsity political troll) and I can tell when she gets up in the morning because my notifications go haywire. She "likes" EVERY SINGLE THING I WRITE, which... okay, it's nice that she is interested and all, but STAHHHHHHP ITTTT.

She's generally cool and we get along better now than we ever have but she's kind of stalker-y, man!