If I've learned one thing, you guys, it's this. If someone tells you to your face that they don't care about you or your feelings, cut them the fuck out of your life. Only three people have done this to me in my life: my father, the Abusive Asshole, and the Terrible Roommate. That should say a lot.

(For the backstory on the TR, see this post.)

So the TR finally moves out on Sunday. For the week and a half prior to her moving out she stacks boxes and boxes of her things all over my living room, puts a huge mound of furniture right inside the front door, and stacks boxes 8 feet high all down the hall and in front of my linen closet so I can't get to my towels. I say nothing, just walk around the shit. There are still a few leftover boxes in the two rooms she and her boyfriend occupied. On Monday my new roommate-to-be wants to repaint her room, so she asks if we can move the boxes so they're all in one room. I say, sure, that's probably fine. It's a few boxes and one shoe rack and I've been tripping over their things for a week and a half. Time to reclaim my house. We move things and begin painting.

Apparently daring to touch her things (which were in boxes, remember, it's not like I went through them) was the WORLD'S GREATEST SIN. The TR felt the need to loudly complain to GreenHunk, leave a nasty note on the porch, AND break her two-month-long vow of silence toward me to send me a Facebook message about it. And...yeah. I can only take so much. I gave her the practical explanation of why I did it, and then I said this: "You lost the right to be treated with kindness when you started giving me the silent treatment and posting passive aggressive shit about me on Facebook. You made my home feel like a war zone." She backhandedly called me stupid and immature, so I responded, "You're right, I am smart and mature. Too smart to be taken advantage of and too mature to be friends with someone who treats me like I don't matter." Of course then she blocked me on Facebook.

That's it. Greenheart has officially HAD IT with the TR. And she still owes me money. So I decide it's time to do what people keep suggesting I do: change the locks. I immediately do so, and then I sent her boyfriend a nice little message about it: "Please let her know that I changed the locks. You are more than welcome to come get your stuff, I have not touched it, but you will have to let me know ahead of time. Let her know that after you retrieve your things I will consider her presence on my property trespassing and will call the cops. As for your rent termination date, considering the money you both owe me, the fact that I never charged you late fees even though you were late on your rent multiple times, the two months' free rent I gave her and the three months I left the room open for you, I think we are even. I am well within my legal rights - she has threatened me with bodily harm in the past. Let her know that if any of the windows are damaged I will consider her the prime suspect and call the police."

As far as I'm concerned, that's that. My home is my own again, and I'll never see the TR again. But GreenHunk, as many of you know, is the king of evil revenge schemes. Usually I'm the voice of reason stopping him from actually executing those schemes, but this time, when he told me he was going to put cat poop from the litter box in one of her stupid hideous shoes, I let him. Maybe I'm going to hell but it will be worth it when she steps in cat shit.