Please help me.

I had Chipotle today (mmm burritos). I decided to get red chili salsa on my burrito. Chipotle NEVER makes me sick, ever. And I like me some spicy food and have never gotten sick from anything spicy.

EXCEPT FOR TODAY.

I cannot stop pooping. It feels like I'm shitting straight hot sauce. My mom kind of laughed at me as I crawled out of the bathroom crying "MY BUTTHOLE IS ON FIYA."

It hurts. Someone send help.

No more red chili salsa. No more red chili salsa ever.

How was everyone else's Labor Day?

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