Today is the first time in 3 years that I am not working in baseball. I have many thoughts about it.
Was my time spent at the ballpark the best for my mental health? No. Did I get the validation that I needed from management? No. Did I meet the man who would become my partner in one of the unhealthiest relationships ever? You bet. I still can't watch a baseball game on TV. I will never set foot in the ballpark that I used to work at again.
Fast forward to today. I am going to school for a career I love. I'm in a much better place mentally. I'm in a healthy relationship. I am away from all of the pettiness that can occur in the front office. My former manager's words still haunt me:
"People cringe when they see your name on the schedule."
Which is a GREAT thing to say to someone whose been hospitalized for mental illness! But, I still cried today. I miss the good people that I worked with (there are roses beneath the weeds), and I miss making someone's day better at the ballpark.
I have so many feels.