I just hopped onto Pinterest and...oh look at that...a gazillion photos of new babies and mommies, happy new baby-makes-threesomes, etc.

Overall I am okay with the decisions I have made but sometimes (often, really) I am just hit with the realization that I broke up a little family that was good. And that's just it, it wasn't BAD. I wasn't miserable. It was not cut and dry.

And, while the person I am with now wasn't the reason, he was the catalyst. If things were to fully dissolve with us, I wouldn't run back to my ex. It wasn't an him v him situation. I just...

Every great memory I had with my ex was post baby. I realize that. I also realize that I am 34 and as much as I am crazy in love with him, I would be batshit motherfucking insane to procreate with my current boyfriend. I don't even really like babies, and yet...BABIES.

There are just so many feelings. I hate feelings.